Spirits and Souls
by Izuals lost soul
Summary: Little bit of humor. To all y'all who thinks 2nd chappy is the end, it goes on! 3rd chappy up, plz read+review!
1. Stampede!

Disclaimer: I don't own Diablo 2, blizzard does, at least i hope so.  
  
Ok now the real story begins! ( Name if the main character is really crappy but thats the only things i can think of. If you have any suggestions of names tell me, i might use it!)  
  
  
  
As Soulien walked across the damp dry grass, he was thinking about where he will go next and get some money. "I'll be suprised if anyone even lives here. There are demons everywhere." Then Soulien heard a shrilling scream. "What the hell was that!" He runs toward the sound. Then a blurry figure runs past him. "Wait up!" "Run!!!" The voice shouts. "Whats her problem?" Then he looks behind him. There it was, a stampede of demons and undeads and gargantiums. "Hoooly shit!!! There must be at least like 50 of em!!! Now THAT is a really good reason to run!" He runs as fast as he can.  
  
After a while of running and screamming, Soulien finaly caught up with the rouge. "Man you are fast! Why are these monsters after you? And whats your name?" "My name is Flavie. I protect Rouge Encampment.Some monsters are was getting too close so I had to shoot them. Unfortunally, I shot Bishibosh the commander of fallens. He got mad and the stampede happened." She said. "We are getting close to the encampment. My sisters will help us battle. "Us battle? You mean YOU battle. I'm getting out of here!" "Oh comeon, you will be rewarded greatly." Flavie said. Did you say reward?" Soulien asked. "Im in!"  
  
They duo came to the encampment and dozens of rouges came out shooting arrows. They also stopped running and started fighting. Flavie was shooting fire arrows rapidly while Soulien was throwing his blades at the hoard. The rouges were shocked to see souls flying everywhere. "What are thoes white things flying everywhere?" Flavie asked. "Thats just me sucking souls."Soulien answered"Makes my blades more effective." When the monsters got too close, Soulien started swinging his blade everywhere. Monster's souls where flying this way and that. You can just die from the sound! It sounds horrible!  
  
A fallen can near Soulien and got his head slashed off. Soulien grabbed the head and started chanting something. Than suddenly, the fallen's soul can out of its mouth, eyes, and nose. It was screamming so loudly that the everyone started looking at him. Then the soul exploded right in front of Bishibosh! Bishibosh flew a few yard away and started cursing and firing fire balls everywhere. A few rouges got hit and died. "Die Bishibosh!!!" He slashed a couple of fallens to make his way to bishibosh. "Go back to the pits of hell! And don't even bother going in my blades! Suffer in hell!!!" With that he swung at bishibosh with all his might and choped Bishibosh in half.  
  
After a while of screamming and killing, the remaining monsters ran away and the everyone started cheering. Then after it had settled down Kayasha came and had a talk with Flavie. "What the hell was that?!" Asked Kayasha "Sorry,it won't happen again." Flavie answered. "It had better not, or you can just say goodbye to your job!"kayasha walked away. "Whats her problem?" Asked Soulien. "Its getting late, can I stay here for the night?" "Sure!" Answered Flavie. And then they slept peacfuly resting from today's hard battle.  
  
  
  
Ok is it better? Not just the boring intro anymore. Review and tell me if I should continue the story. By the way its my first fanfic story so don't expect a masterpiece. 


	2. Bloody Den of Evil

Disclaimer: I don't own Diablo 2 or anything about it.  
  
Thanks for the tip about the warrior. I'm a bad speller and can't win no spelling bee I tried to win so desperately. By the way, its not the end of the story. It would be a bad story if it ended right there, wouldn't it? Oh yea and now I have an editor so I would like to thank him for helping me write this story. ( Oh yea, this is how you write a fanfic for the guy who wants to know. You write it in a word proccessor and then you go to document manager and upload it. Then you go to create a story and go from there.  
  
"Cuu cuu cuu!" The rooster cuus and the sun rises. Soulien and the rouges were still asleep, exhausted from yesterday's battle. " Shut up you damn rooster!" Yells Soulien. He comes out half naked and throws a blade into the rooster. "Damnit!' Yelled Kayasha. "You killed our one and only rooster! Now we can't wake up on time to protect our camp!" "Die you bastard!" "Whoa calm down! I'm sorry." Apologized Soulien. " Is there anything I can do to help?" Then suddenly out of nowhere, Akara poped out of nowhere. " Speaking of help, you can-" "God damnit Akara are you going to tell him to clean up the monsters in the den of evil?!" Yelled kayasha. " I told you! My rouges can handle those wimpy low class monsters!" "Not with that attitude!" "Just watch me!" "fine!" With that Akara walks away leaving Soulien clueless.??????  
  
The rain dripped and nothing happened for about a hour. "pss, come here." Whispered Akara. Soulien looks confused and then finally reached her tent. "Will you clear the Den of Evil even though that ignorant Kayasha says not to? We need all the help we can get." "I don't know.." "There will be a rewaaarrrrd." She said with a bribing voice. "Oh gooooooody!!!!!" Yelled Soulien. " Oh yea."Akara remembered. " Mind taking that hood off? You look like a criminal." "Do I have to?" Soulien whined. 'Ok fine, since I'm not assassinating anyone in the camp, I'll take it off. But when I'm battling, it goes right back on. "Ok" said Akara. As he takes off the hood Akara sees some long, silky, blue hair and a handsome face. "Wow, I don't know why you wear that thing, you look much better without it!"Said Akara. (He is sooooooooooo hot!!!) (a/n: Pervert...). "It's a habit" Soulien answered.  
  
As Soulien was walking through Blood Moor, he was killing and summoning soul knights. They are really creepy, almost like the Necro's skeletons, except not that skinny and have a really pale look. Right now, when he summons them they only come with double sabres, but it all depends on experience. "God dammit these quill rats, shooting quills behind bushes. How sissy like!" He was getting pissed off. "Who has ever heard of a quill shooting porcupine anyway!" Then it began to rain and the quill rats went into their little caves like sissies. Not the zombies though. "Ha, they are so slow, better not get hit by one of those though. One hit from that could knock me-" POW!!!. A gargatian beast smashed Soulien with all its might. "Owwwwwwwww!!!" He screamed. He turns around and almost peed his pants. "Holy @*%$&#*! That thing is huuuuggggee!!!!!!!" He ran as fast as he can. There was a house and he ran inside stupidly. But inside where little demon halflings and what looked like a shaman. "God now I'm stuck!" He stuck one down and soon was revived. "Shit these things are annoying!" Soulien ordered the soul knights to attack the shaman and soon brought him down. "Ha! Your shaman is deeaad!" He said in a sing-song voice. "Rakanishu!"(Shit! Shaman dead!) "Die!!!" Soulien yelled at the top of his lunges." He kicks ass and leaves. Then he goes outside and there was still some gargs there. He starts throwing soul reavers. Soon the monsters were dead. " I'm getting good!!!" He rejoiced. Soulien scouted the area and finally finds the Den of Evil and goes in. "Holy Shit!!!" He yells. "There are a million monsters here!!!" Soulien thinks it would be a good idea to use long ranged combat so he wouldn't get hurt. But then a zombie sneaked up behind him and whacked him hard!"Owwww!"  
  
Soulien's soul knights kicked the zombies' asses. The soul knights then came to their master's aid. They grabbed a healing potion and dumped it down Soulien's throat. "Ahhh much better!" said the refreshed Soul Warrior. "Thanks guys. Ahh!! Watch out!" A fallen tries to strike a soul knight but misses due to the warning. "Die!!" Soulien screams. He strikes the fallen killing it. He then scouts the area and kills anything he can find. He usually kills zombies in one hit but when he hit a weird looking zombie he wouldn't die. "I am Corpsefire, the leader of the den!" It moaned. Soulien sends his soul knights but gets pummeled in one hit. "Hahaha." Said Soulien, I have a secret weapon. Soul Blast!!!" A soul comes out of Soulien's palms and shot at Corpsefire. The blast was so strong it blows Corpesfire up. "Ha, eat that!" Soulien spat at Corpsefire's corpse. Then a bright light shines through the den. Soulien uses a town portal and goes to Akara to claim his reward.  
  
  
  
How was that? A long chappy!!! Yay!!! Review!!! I got a Grandfather here!!! 


	3. Blood Raven has a new body to tortureOr ...

Disclaimer: I don't own anything about Diablo 2. I wish, but I don't.  
"I shall teach you a new skill or strengthen your old ones" Akara announced. "What skill should I do?" " Try making my Spirit Blast a bit stronger please" Soulien replied. "There wasn't enough gut blasting out Corpsfire." Akara looked at him with an eyebrow raised "What a weirdo!" She thought. She placed her hands on Soulien's forehead and chanted something. Then suddenly, Soulien felt a surge of energy flowing through him. "I got the POWER!!!" He shouted so loud even Gheed from the other side of the encampment heard him and almost drowned while taking a bath. (I wish he did.).  
  
Well anyway, he went out of Akara's tent and striked a conversation with Kayasha. "Hey Soulien, mind doing me a favor?" She asked. "Sure, but I thought you don't need any help?" He replied teasingly. Kayasha's face glowed red and shouted, "Shut the hell up! I'm not God you know! Now go kill Blood Raven or no reward!" With that, she walked away.  
  
"Yahoooooo!!!!!" Soulien shouted. "Reward!!!" He jumped up and down and ran out of the encampment with incredible speed and slayed anything in his way. "Blood Raven, you my friend, is going to be my next lunch ticket!" After a couple of zombies and quill rats, he came to the Cold Plains. "Hi Flavie!" he said as he ran to the entrance. "What's up?" "I'm guarding the camp from far distance. What's the hurry?" She responded. "Nothin much, just going to go kill Blood Raven." He answered. "What?! You are gona get your ass kicked!!!" She said. "You don't want to mess with Blood Raven, you don't know what she is like. She is gonna torture you until you wish you were never born!" "Aww c'mon! She can't be that bad." Soulien responded. "Oh well, time is money!" He hurried into the Cold Plains.  
  
Just after Soulien talked to Flavie, he stepped into the Cold Plains. He was so freezing he could jump into a fire if there was one. "So.cold." He shivered. "Must.get.back.to.camp." Just at that moment he stepped on something round and got transported to Rogue Encampment. "Whaaaaooo!!!" He exclaimed. "Sweeeet!" Soulien then walked over to Charsi. "Can I buy a jacket?" Soulien asked. "Sure whatever." Charsi responded. "1000 gold leave it or take it." She offered. "Man you sure know how to rip someone off!" Soulien exclaimed. "You are just like Gheed! What are you, his sister?!" "No he is my husband." Replied charsi. "He has tainted my ways of selling." She said with a frown. "But I sure am getting rich!" She burst out. Soulien then slaps his head and walked back to the waypoint, preparing to be cold again.  
  
When Soulien got into the Cold Plains, he was freezing and had trouble fighting, but when your life depended on it, it doesn't matter how cold you are. Then a few tainted rogues came and attacked him. He slashed at one and died, sucking the soul into him. He summoned a few Soul Knights and they were taking care of the rogues just fine. As his knights were fighting for him, a hoard of carvers came with Bishibosh at the lead. Their skin was blue and confused Soulien for a bit. "I guess if we can dye our hair, they can dye their skin." He said. "Weird, but oh well, they are going to die anyway. Wait, who is that?! Why, its Bishibosh!!! I thought I killed the bastard!!!" "Raaaaah kaaaaaa niiiiiiii shuuuuuu!" Bishibosh shouted. (You kill twin brother! You now shall pay!) And it started shooting fireballs at Soulien. One hit Soulien and he started burning up. "I appreciate you trying to warm me! But its getting toooooooooooo hot!!!" He yelled and started charging at Bishibosh but all the carvers got into his way and started chopping at him. Soulien got so mad his Soul Knights started to hold different weapons. For some magical reason, his knights started holding 2 handed sword in one hand and a kite shield in the other. They kicked the tainted rogues' ass and came to exterminate the carvers. But Bishibosh revived them all. He now got so pissed off he even learned now attacks. He ran toward bishibosh dodging all the carvers. He started swinging at Bishibosh but were all dodged and blocked. "That's it!" He shouted. "Soul Binding!" A soul came out of Soulien's hand and started wrapping around Bishibosh so it can't move anymore. "Flaming Spirit!" Another soul came out of his hands and caught on fire in mid air. It flew at Bishibosh and blew him into bits. It flew so high even Tyreal had to wipe it off his cloak. (Not really)  
  
"That's that!" Soulien said. "But it is still so cold. I do wish it would get warmer." Just then, it started getting warmer, warmer, WARMER, AND SOON IT WAS BURING!!!!! "Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawwwwwwwwwww!!!" Soulien shouted jumping up and down with hands on his ass. "Who the hell..!" "O my god I am sooo sorry." A pally said and turned his Holy Fire off. The Pally saying sorry like a thousand time and Soulien shushed him up and they started becoming friends.  
  
"What's your name?" Asked Soulien. "William." Said the pally. "And yours?" "Soulien." Replied Soulien. They started camping out there since it was very late, with a slight touch of holy fire to keep warm. "So you are on a quest to kill blood raven?" Asked the pally. "Sure am!" Answered Soulien. "How bout you?" "I am heading to Lut Gholien, back to my wife Fara and my kids." Said William. "Oh, so you are going there on foot?" Asked Soulien. "Yes I am, I know it is a long way but I must. "Answered William. With that, they fell asleep. The next morning, Soulien woke to find William gone, with a jacket to keep warm.  
  
Soulien trotted down the cold plains, killing here and there. He then met a pathway out of there. "This must be where blood raven is". Soulien announced. "Gives me the creeps." He trots forward then sees a LOT of undead. There was a corrupted rogue in the middle of them all. They were surrounding him with nowhere to go. "Soul knight arise!" Four knights appeared out of nowhere and were holding off the hungry dead.for now. He charged at blood raven killing anything in the way. "That's a bloody lookin woman!" Soulien rushed near her but then she ran off in the distance and starting shooting at him. "God!!! You are just like quill rats! Sissy!!!" And started chasing after her like a dog chases a cat. But blood raven had the advantage. By now, his knights were are dead and the undead surrounded him again. He was so mad he started screaming and the hole place shook! "You bunch of NO-GOOD-SISSY-COCK SUCKING-MOTHER FUCKING-BUNCH OF WUSSYS!!!!!" With that, four soul archers came out of nowhere and started shooting at blood raven. "Ha! Your archers can't compete with me!" Blood raven laughs. She then shoots two arrow at one time and hits both of his legs. "Ahhhhhhhhhhrrrrrrrr!!!" He roars in pain. Then everything goes dark.  
That's it! A cliffy, hahahaha! Review and you'll find out! 


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